Everything always goes wrong when you want to kill someone!
by I'll Cover Angel and Collins
Summary: Trent and Duncan committed the perfect murder! Except for the flat tire and forgetting to bring a weapon and digging 9 holes when they only needed one...It didn't turn out THAT bad.


**Disclaimer: I don't own anything except this idea...I'm not even sure I want credit for this...I don't even know where this idea came from!**

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It was the worst 3 hours of Duncan's life! In those 3 hours he managed to kill Gwen, Get a flat tire, lose the $10 in his pocket and if that wasn't bad enough, he was stuck in the middle of the woods with Trent which if he didn't even talk to Trent today none of this would have happened.

"Trent, I swear I'm going to kill you!" Duncan glared at him by this point as Trent helped him carry Gwen's corpse through the woods. "This is ALL your fault!"

"You're the one who told me to kill her" Trent rolled his eyes "Who knew she was this heavy?"

"It's called dead weight!" Duncan yelled at him "Which is what you are!"

* * *

_Flashback _

_(It was 7:43am when Duncan was taking a shower and Trent happened to be brushing his teeth in the community Bathroom) _

_"Dammit!" Duncan yelled "Gwen used the last of my green hair dye!"_

_"It's just dye" Trent responded as he split toothpaste in the sink "Just buy some more?" _

_"Buy more?! This is almost twenty dollars a bottle!" Duncan yelled "This is the 4th time she did this! Sometimes I just want to kill her!"_

* * *

"You do realize we are going to jail if we get caught?" Duncan asked Trent

"Yeah, but this is so fun!" Trent admitted "I never felt so free!"

"Trent, shut up..." Duncan glared at him "I went to juvie because I spray painted the entire school! I don't want to go to jail for killing someone!"

"I killed her..." Trent told her "Don't forget that!"

"How could I forget?" Duncan glared "I'm an accomplice to murder!"

"Yeah, but look how fun this is!" Trent laughed "Now all we need to do is kill 8 more people..."

"Are you kidding me?" Duncan asked him "This was hard enough to get her here and we still have to dig the holes..."

"holes?" Duncan groaned "As in more than one?"

"Obviously" Trent told him "We need at least 9 holes for 9 different body parts!"

"Are you fucking serious?" Duncan asked him "I'm not going to dig nine holes!"

"Why not?" Trent asked him. "If we put a hand here and another hand over there it will take them longer to find her!"

"So you want me to dig holes while you dismember Gwen?" Duncan asked him "Dude, you belong in a mental ward"

"Yep, Unless you want to dismember Gwen while I dig those holes!" Trent happily offered as he whistled away "I'm going to go get my axe from the car!"

"You keep an Axe in your car?" Duncan asked wide eyed

"Who doesn't?" Trent asked and laughed like a nutcase "Remember! The holes need to be 9 feet deep!"

"Normal people" Duncan mumbled as Trent skipped away.

* * *

About 2 hours later Trent returned with an axe and saw that Duncan had dug the 9 holes.

"Happy?!" Duncan threw the shovel on the ground "What the hell took you so long?!"

"I forgot where I parked?" Trent awkwardly replied "The holes look great!"

"Okay, Now you're going to chop her up right?" Duncan asked "I can't bring myself to do it"

"I was hoping you would do it" Trent told him "I'm not a fan of blood"

"Then why would you suggest cutting her up?" Duncan glared at Trent

"Fine!" Trent sighed "I guess I could do it your way! Grab an end of her and toss her in!"

Duncan and Trent each lifted Gwen's body over a hole and threw her in.

"What the hell?!" Gwen suddenly yelled "What are you two doing?! Where the hell are we?!"

"Shit!" Duncan pulled her out of the hole "You're still alive!"

"You thought I was dead?" Gwen glared at the two of them

"It was all Trent's idea" Duncan pointed to Trent

"Duncan told me to do it!" Trent pointed back at Duncan "Duncan, Why didn't you check her pulse before you started digging?!"

"Wait...You guys were going to bury me in the woods?" Gwen glared at them

"We were going to dismember you too..." Trent awkwardly laughed "Good thing you woke up or you would have been in 9 pieces!"

"You were going to cut me into pieces too?!" Gwen glared at Duncan "What kind of boyfriend and ex boyfriend are you two?!"

"Well I'm an ex so I have more reason" Trent admitted "Duncan's just a bad boyfriend"

"Well to be fair you did use my hair dye..." Duncan awkwardly laughed "So yeah...Since Gwen is not dead and we don't have to bury a body and worry about going to jail how about we just go back to the camp?"

"I second that!" Trent agreed "C'mon Gwen...We wouldn't really do that..."

"Yes, you would" Gwen looked at them both "Don't even talk to me! I'm mad at both of you"

"Since you're mad anyway..." Duncan informed her "We have a flat tire and have no way of getting back!"

"Do you two see these 9 holes?" Gwen glared at them both picking up the axe

"Yes..." Both of the boys awkwardly looked at the holes.

"They are going to be filled VERY soon!" Gwen lunged at them with the axe in hand.

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**I don't know why I wrote this. This should be under the "WTF was the writer even thinking when they wrote this" Category! I have no clue why I wrote this and I'm sure 95% of you have no clue why you even wasted your time reading this. In all honesty? I pictured Trent being a nutcase and trying to hide a body in the woods by digging 9 holes...No fucking clue why! Then I thought of someone who would help him do it but not be thrilled with it...Enter Duncan! Yeah, if you were in my head it would be funnier...**


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